Page 1 of 2 12 Last»
Results 1 to 25 of 28
  1. #1
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Chapter 38: Capture the Flag


    Naruto rubs his eyes as he looks at the genin. Udon fixes his glasses and shows a blush of embarrassment *Nii-sama...*

    Naruto opens his eyes more as something comes to his mind. “Jiraiya-kun, Hime-chan where are you? Don't tell me you guys didn't make it?!” Naruto walks through crowd with his slippers looking desperately for his children.

    Jiraiya and Hime hide behind Team Kankuro, trying to keep their father from finding them. “You know, I'm actually starting to like this guy.” Koichi says shifting his eyes down towards Jiraiya and Hime.

    “Shut up!” they both whisper.

    “Oh good, you guys are here.” Naruto says appearing behind his children. Jiraiya and Hime stand up blushing in embarrassment and they notice a few of the genin chuckling as they watch.

    “Daddy!” Hime whines.

    “You're the Hokage for god's sake could you at least act and dress appropriately.” Jiraiya says.

    “Nice to see you too jerk.” Naruto says immaturely. Naruto walks back out of the crowd and faces the genin again. He clears his throat and looks at them.

    “Alright, my name is Naruto Uzumaki, although you should all know that, considering how I'm the Hokage.” Naruto rubs his nose rather arrogantly boasting about his position. “As well as being the leader of the host village of the exams I'm also going to be running this next exam as it was all my idea for this new test.”

    The crowd is silent and unenthusiastic about the Hokage's speech as very few take him seriously in his current attire. “Stop fooling around Naruto.” Gamakichi says. “Get on with it already.”

    “Fine, fine. Here's the exam in a nutshell, there are an even number of teams right?” He asks turning towards Udon.

    “16 teams.” Udon says.

    “Right, so that means there will be....2, 4, 6...8 units meaning two teams per unit. Every unit will be given colored flags. You'll have a designated territory within these grounds. All you have to do is take the flags of your opponents to win, simple as that. You'll have 72 hours to capture as many flags from the other teams as possible before then.” Naruto explains.

    “What's the purpose of this test?” Koichi asks. “Why wouldn't we just simply do this within our own teams of three, it'd be more difficult working with other teams that we know almost nothing about.”

    “That's the thing.” Naruto says holding his hand up. “The most powerful nations in the shinobi world, who had been waring for generations found a way to put their differences aside for a common cause and fight together. We may never know when our forces must ally again therefor it's essential for a test like this so that the future generation, meaning you, are capable of doing what your predecessors have. Not only does this teach the appropriate way to fight along side other nations in battle, but it gives you valuable war simulation.” Just as Naruto is talking the genin notice all the proctors leaving the facility with the exception of Udon, and Hinata who remain.

    “Hey, where are they going?” A shinobi asks. “Don't we need the proctors to make sure nothing happens?”

    “You don't need to worry about that.” Naruto says. “Now if there are no more questions we can begin, Udon, Hinata get them ready for me.” Naruto and Gamakichi disappear in another cloud of smoke leaving only Udon and Hinata left in the presence of the genin.

    “Wow, Konoha has one sorry Hokage.” One of Lee's teammates says. As they say that the rest of the Konoha participants look upon them with anger and they catch the attention of Hinata and Udon. “Who calls away all the proctors of a match in the presence of over 40 shinobi who'd do whatever it took to pass these exams and leaves only two light weights”

    In an instant every Konoha shinobi shoots out towards the three Iwagakure shinobi. Team Kankuro and Team Maiyuri all create a perimeter around the Iwa shinobi stopping the genin. Koichi holds two kunai to Jiraiya and Hime, one at Hime's neck and Jiraiya's solar plexus keeping them at bay. Ryoko holds out her two katana towards two shinobi while Koji stands in front of her holding out his hand. His puppet is connected to chakra strings and keeps the third shinobi at bay. Masaomi holds a shinobi with a kunai to his neck from behind, Koga has his fingers at the headbands of two other shinobi and Shizuko stands holding a kunai out in front of her in between the Iwa shinobi and another Konoha shinobi.

    “Get out of our way!” A black haired kunoichi says. She stares at Ryoko with her crimson eyes and light eyeshadow.

    “Not a chance.” Ryoko says.

    “Koichi, if you don't want to get hurt you'd better move.” Hime says in a calm yet stern tone.

    “You're all being complete idiots!” Koichi rebuts...Koichi shifts his eyes to the left and then he quickly leaps up onto Jiraiya and Hime's shoulders. Koji retracts his puppet and gets on top of it as well just as Ryoko and the others surrounding the genin find themselves paralyzed and unable to move. “Tricky little bastard.” Koichi says looking over to Tenzen casting his shadow imitation on all the Suna genin, aside from Koichi and Koji.

    “Nobody says anything bad against our Hokage and if you try to defend them you're going down.” The young child says. Suddenly the young kid finds himself absent of his will as well and the technique is released on all the captured genin. “What?”

    “How ironic is it that someone as smart as you is being really stupid right now.” Temari says from behind her little brother. Temari captures Tenzen in the same technique, and controls his every movement. “Just like Koichi-san said, you're being stupid. You would've been disqualified if you attacked any of the other teams outside of the exam restrictions. Personally I don't care about these other people and with you, I think you need a few more years under your belt before you qualify to take the exams runt, but I'm not your sensei so I just have to deal with it, such a bother.”

    “Disqualified would've been the least of your problems.” Koichi says. Both him and Koji turn their attention to the three Iwa genin, all of whom have a slight cynical grin on their face, including Lee. The Konoha genin as well as Ryoko and everybody else are confused, believing their intent for stopping the Konoha was the same as what Temari explained.

    “Koichi-san, who knew you'd be the one to say that.” Lee says in a shocked yet mocking tone. He still smiles and lowers his head. “I never figured you to be this perceptive.”

    “Alright now, can I please have all your attention.” Hinata says. All the genin turn and look at Hinata smiling next to Udon. “You've all been given your tags and placed in your units.” The genin look to their sides and see a belt with colored tags on them. All appear to be shocked as they have no idea as to when either Hinata or Udon had placed the flags on them.

    Lee looks at the Hyuuga kunoichi; his expression changing from cynical arrogance to discontent *I didn't even see her...damn it.*

    “How the hell did—”

    “Our mother is perfectly capable of killing all of us if she wanted to. You worried about the our father leaving, you should have been more worried about her staying.” Jiraiya says smiling.

    “Now I would like for the teams with the same colored flags to line up at the gate where they see their colors lined up please so we can begin.”

    Every team heads to the gate with their color lined up with it. Jiraiya and his team find themselves paired up with Team Kankuro with violet flags.

    “Hey, what were you talking about before Koichi?” Jiraiya asks.

    “Those three Iwa genin...they're weird and not in a good way. I don't know for sure but that Lee character has some sort of chakra based technique even though he doesn't have any chakra.”

    “That's impossible, he can't use ninjutsu if he doesn't have any chakra.” Hime says.

    “I'm just telling you what I noticed. He doesn't seem like it but I'm almost positive he's leading those teammates of his, they're nothing more then pawns for him and they're obedient to whatever he says. Regardless, they're not normal either. If you guys had gotten close to either of them there would've been some bad repercussions.” Koichi says.

    “And you two knew about this and didn't tell me?” Ryoko says annoyed.

    “We thought you could see it too Ryoko-chan.” Koji says somewhat surprised that she didn't.

    “Now, the Hokage left out something important about this next exam...the rules.” Udon says.

    “This training ground is 50km so there is exactly 6.25km for every team. There will be a hut with a scroll in it. That is your crown jewel. Your territories will be marked for you. What Naruto-sama said was true but there are two ways to win. If a unit is stripped of 4 of their 6 flags of their comrades, their unit looses. However, if a team looses their scroll to another unit they loose. The only exception is if a unit has already taken a scroll, then they are still alive since they have a second scroll. That being said, if a unit takes the scroll of another unit, they must loose 5 of their 6 flags in order to loose. A third scroll grants immunity and that team will advance onwards.” Udon finishes his explanation.

    “Now here's what it means to win and to loose. If any member of a unit looses their flag they're out of the rest of the exams. A flag is not lost until it successfully reaches the captor's side of the field, or they loose it on another person's field. The same goes for the scroll however a scroll cannot leave the grounds. If an entire unit looses, either by flag count or scroll loss everyone in that unit will not proceed onwards. However the rules concerning individual flags taken may be rectified if an entire team receives immunity. Regardless if you've lost your flag or not, if your team gets immunity, they shall pass. Everybody will have a 1hour period to find their base and decide what plans of actions you'll take. In that time period no team is allowed to cross into other territories.” Hinata walks away from the genin as they stand looking determined. “Oh and one last thing, at least three units must be eliminated by the end of the 72 hour mark or all teams fail.” The looks on the genins' faces become more serious as the stakes thicken. “Now...without further ado...Begin!” The gates shoot open and the units all dart out and begin their exams.

    Note:
    Red Unit
    Kiri Team 11(Anbu Team)
    Iwa Team 1 (Lee's Team)

    Orange Unit
    Konoha Team Shikamaru/Choji
    Suna Team Maiyuri

    Yellow Unit
    Konoha Team Lee
    Suna Team Takashi

    Green Unit
    Kusa Team Futa (Random)
    Konoha Team Idate (Random)

    Blue Unit
    Iwa Team Shin (Random)
    Taki Team 3 (Random)

    Indigo Unit
    Konoha Team Moegi (Random team but we know the sensei...)
    Ame Team 22 (Random)

    Violet Unit
    Konoha Team Neji
    Suna Team Kankuro

    White Unit
    Kumo Team 4 (Random)
    Kiri Team 7 (Random)


    The violet unit darts down their path as the mission begins.

    “How are we supposed to find the hut and everything?” Koichi asks.

    “The scroll is coated in chakra.” Ryoko says. “Not only that but so are all the flags as well.”

    “Then we can have two sensors head out in teams and have them head out to other territories and take their flags.” Hime says.

    “We'll divide up into groups of two and—”

    “We need to pick a leader.” Hi says interrupting Jiraiya. The group of six stop and turn to Hi. “We can't have dozens of ideas from different minds circling around, we need quick and decisive action, somebody needs to take charge.”

    Ryoko turns and looks at Koichi. “Koichi is the best person for the job.” Ryoko says.

    “I second that.” Koji says.

    “Now hold on a minute, what makes you think we'll put one of you in charge.” Hime says. “We know this type of terrain better then anybody and we have the sharper sensory abilities to scout out, I nominate Jiraiya-nii.”

    “Just because you live here and are the Hokage's children doesn't mean you get to boss us around. Who says your sensory abilities are better anyway.” Ryoko rebuts catty.

    “Stop it both of you!” Koichi says. “This isn't about sensing our enemies whereabouts, this is about using the best methods of strategy to deal with our enemy. We need to fight them, not each other. I'm not saying this in arrogance but I can tell just by looking at everybody here that I have the strongest war strategic mentality here. My father was Sunagakure's head general, since I was in the academy I studied wars, strategies, and have made my goal to prepare for war if it should ever come. You don't have to take my word for it if you don't want to but it is important for us to work together.”

    “I'm going to cast my vote for Koichi-san.” Hi says.

    “Hi!” Hime says with shock in his voice.

    “Me too.” Hime turns to her brother again in shock. “You're not as much a goof as I thought you were. If you say you can do this then so be it. I'm putting my trust in you and my team in your hands. Hime-chan...”

    Hime looks at Koichi, his face determined and serious. “Fine, I'll trust you too.”

    “Alright, then lets go.” Koichi says. He takes the lead out front and the violet unit lays their trust in Koichi.
    ~Orange Units Territory~


    Team Maiyuri and Team Shikamaru travel down their path heading towards their hut. As they travel through the forest the two teams pass by a tree. The backside of the tree faces away from the moons light and keeps it in the shadow, as they pass, menacing yellow eyes open and Shinji steps out, his body visible as a silhouette.

    “She should prove very beneficial to Kabuto-sama...should she possess her clan's ability...Mika Yuhi.”

    To Be Continued...

    Author's Note:
    I actually met a deadline this week *round of Applause...baby make that ass clap * Those of you who know the song by Waka and Drake will get the refrance but on topic this is an importnat build up chapter. I hope you like it. Comment on what you liked/disliked, think I did well on/not so well on etc. To those of you who read/comment/rep this post thank you, enjoy


     
         
    Last edited by Reborn; 05-21-2012 at 04:01 AM.

  2. #2
    Premium User Shady Doctor's Avatar
    Status
    Shady Doctor is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Xo 'til we Overdoze!
    Posts
    12,172
    Post Thanks / Like
    One doesn't simply turn Obito
    to ash; It causes him to go
    uchiha baby jesus mode, giving
    away Susanoo like slices of
    bread. u.u
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Red and Orange team ftw.lol

    BBut good chapter, ryoko showed her lameness again. "And you two knew about this and didn't tell me?!" . She was clueless to lee's chakra barrier thingy.ha

    Ahh Tenzen was about to handle the puny suna/iwa ninja if temari didn't interfere.

    Can't wait until next chapter.. and what bloodline was shinji talking about?
     
         

  3. #3
    Rikudo Sennin ~Uzumaki~'s Avatar
    Status
    ~Uzumaki~ is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Nigeria
    Posts
    6,133
    Post Thanks / Like
    The Lord is my light and my
    salvation; whom shall I fear?
    the Lord is the strength of my
    life; of whom shall I be
    afraid
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Naruto came up with sth cool. Kabuto's making another appearance? Yay! Anyways, Koichi surprises me, I was sure he would just be a block head but the kid's pretty good. What's with Koichi being leader? Jiraiya is better, his FATHER is an Hokage. I'm a Jiraiya fanboy.
     
         
    Last edited by ~Uzumaki~; 05-19-2012 at 03:46 AM.

  4. #4
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by william24 View Post
    Red and Orange team ftw.lol

    BBut good chapter, ryoko showed her lameness again. "And you two knew about this and didn't tell me?!" . She was clueless to lee's chakra barrier thingy.ha

    Ahh Tenzen was about to handle the puny suna/iwa ninja if temari didn't interfere.

    Can't wait until next chapter.. and what bloodline was shinji talking about?
    She knew of the chakra technique, she just didn't know their intentions at the time. It was meant to be more of a brotherly telepathy thing going on between them since I haven't played that much in the series. However, they're close enough to Ryoko that they believe she's up to speed with them but she's not. Also, Ryoko is better then half those genin there

    I wanted go give Tenzen a little badassness however I had to make sure people knew he was still seven. Tbh, and I can say this since it poses little relivance to the story (Tenzen's not that important atm)

    Shadow Imitation is the limit of his ability. He's probably a little less then Shikamaru was at when he entered the chuunin exams, but that's alright, he's 4 years younger then his father was when he took the exams.

    Temari on the other hand...this *****....well, wait and see.
     
         

  5. #5
    Premium User Shady Doctor's Avatar
    Status
    Shady Doctor is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Xo 'til we Overdoze!
    Posts
    12,172
    Post Thanks / Like
    One doesn't simply turn Obito
    to ash; It causes him to go
    uchiha baby jesus mode, giving
    away Susanoo like slices of
    bread. u.u
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzumaki16 View Post
    Naruto came up with sth cool. Kabuto's making another appearance? Yay! Anyways, Koichi surprises me, I was sure he would just be a block head but the kid's pretty good.
    Koichi a block head? Neverrrrrrr...
    Shukaku broke him off some of his infinite knowledge. >_>
     
         

  6. #6
    I am an amazing Friend Yuka's Avatar
    Status
    Yuka is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Location
    United states
    Posts
    6,311
    Post Thanks / Like
    i'm not feeling well
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    It was a very beautiful fanfic, thank you for sharing it with me
     
         

  7. #7
    Premium User Shady Doctor's Avatar
    Status
    Shady Doctor is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Xo 'til we Overdoze!
    Posts
    12,172
    Post Thanks / Like
    One doesn't simply turn Obito
    to ash; It causes him to go
    uchiha baby jesus mode, giving
    away Susanoo like slices of
    bread. u.u
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    She knew of the chakra technique, she just didn't know their intentions at the time. It was meant to be more of a brotherly telepathy thing going on between them since I haven't played that much in the series. However, they're close enough to Ryoko that they believe she's up to speed with them but she's not. Also, Ryoko is better then half those genin there

    I wanted go give Tenzen a little badassness however I had to make sure people knew he was still seven. Tbh, and I can say this since it poses little relivance to the story (Tenzen's not that important atm)

    Shadow Imitation is the limit of his ability. He's probably a little less then Shikamaru was at when he entered the chuunin exams, but that's alright, he's 4 years younger then his father was when he took the exams.

    Temari on the other hand...this *****....well, wait and see.
    For some reason I just dislike ryoko. Does she have a bloodline limit?

    But yeah I feel you, Tenzen is already doing a nice feat by lasting so long at the age of 7 >_>
    so yeah he should be pretty restricted in power.

    Damn, now I wanna see more of temari.. I fogot they're related to gaara
     
         

  8. #8
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzumaki16 View Post
    Naruto came up with sth cool. Kabuto's making another appearance? Yay! Anyways, Koichi surprises me, I was sure he would just be a block head but the kid's pretty good. What's with Koichi being leader? Jiraiya is better, his FATHER is an Hokage.
    I've given Koichi little credit besides being a powerhouse who is physically superior to his brother, while Koji posesses the mental advantage. There is a completely fuctional mental system with Koichi despite "block head".

    You've already noticed similarities between him and Naruto I'm sure but what separates him from Naruto at his age is the fact that Koichi is purposly acting the way he acts. He's not oblivious to obvious things. He understand things well enough catch a drift and I put in his observation of Lee's abilities during round one, a feat nobody else saw but he noticed the detail. I also put this little tidbit, his reasons for intercepting the Konoha genin was not for the protection of the iwa genin or to protect them from being disquallified but it was because he knew of the intentions and the dangers of getting close to them.

    Jiraiya is very strong I'll give you that. What you don't understand about skill sets is that Jiraiya may be strong but in terms of leading missions in this sense (war like settings against several enemies units) He falls under the bar of the six of them. I don't do this out of favoritetism rather the layouts I've already done.

    The best list for leading a mission like this would have to be Koichi then Koji (both studied closely together, Koichi is war oriented, Koji is universal but not as much war oriented as his brother.) If you noticed back in the academy when Koichi was teaching the academy students, his war tactics questions and knowledge shocked Ryoko (idk if you read those ones).

    Ryoko being raised under Suna's head Anbu shinobi, she has a mentailty of no fail, although I'll admit I've underplayed her heavily here and will have to rectify it.

    Hi as an Aburame is more stratigy based then Jiraiya comes in. All of these characters are leaders but there's different types of leaders for different types of missions.
     
         

  9. #9
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by william24 View Post
    Koichi a block head? Neverrrrrrr...
    Shukaku broke him off some of his infinite knowledge. >_>
    Shukaku ain't said shit since his ass got sealed again lol.

    Quote Originally Posted by Yuka View Post
    It was a very beautiful fanfic, thank you for sharing it with me
    You've very welcome.

    Quote Originally Posted by william24 View Post
    For some reason I just dislike ryoko. Does she have a bloodline limit?

    But yeah I feel you, Tenzen is already doing a nice feat by lasting so long at the age of 7 >_>
    so yeah he should be pretty restricted in power.

    Damn, now I wanna see more of temari.. I fogot they're related to gaara
    Ryoko has no bloodline limit. I wanted to limit the amout of KG I gave central characters. I get the vibe that most people associate Ryoko with Sakura, which I can see how I've placed the similarity in there, she seems to pose a back seat to her teammates and I guess for what I've intended her character for, it will remain that way. Not just the back seat but the character.

    However what I distinguish for her over Sakura as a character is her troubles. Sakura has had an easy life to this point, no past troubles however Ryoko has no mother and a father who only sees her to be a shinobi to make his own image brighter. He gives her no attention other then training her for the aspects he sees fit and stressing upon her entry into Suna's Anbu. If anything I believe I've encompased her strife with her father and herself in the story to bring her away from the Sakura character, who is lost because of her own feelings and confusion, and to another character who is lost because she's neglected.

    She's been neglected and that's the same as being alone. The comparison I'm trying to make is between her and her teammates. All three are in the same boat with the exception of one thing, Ryoko is alone and needs to fight to get away from it. Koichi and Koji...they have each other still.
     
         

  10. #10
    Rikudo Sennin ~Uzumaki~'s Avatar
    Status
    ~Uzumaki~ is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Nigeria
    Posts
    6,133
    Post Thanks / Like
    The Lord is my light and my
    salvation; whom shall I fear?
    the Lord is the strength of my
    life; of whom shall I be
    afraid
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    I've given Koichi little credit besides being a powerhouse who is physically superior to his brother, while Koji posesses the mental advantage. There is a completely fuctional mental system with Koichi despite "block head".

    You've already noticed similarities between him and Naruto I'm sure but what separates him from Naruto at his age is the fact that Koichi is purposly acting the way he acts. He's not oblivious to obvious things. He understand things well enough catch a drift and I put in his observation of Lee's abilities during round one, a feat nobody else saw but he noticed the detail. I also put this little tidbit, his reasons for intercepting the Konoha genin was not for the protection of the iwa genin or to protect them from being disquallified but it was because he knew of the intentions and the dangers of getting close to them.

    Jiraiya is very strong I'll give you that. What you don't understand about skill sets is that Jiraiya may be strong but in terms of leading missions in this sense (war like settings against several enemies units) He falls under the bar of the six of them. I don't do this out of favoritetism rather the layouts I've already done.

    The best list for leading a mission like this would have to be Koichi then Koji (both studied closely together, Koichi is war oriented, Koji is universal but not as much war oriented as his brother.) If you noticed back in the academy when Koichi was teaching the academy students, his war tactics questions and knowledge shocked Ryoko (idk if you read those ones).

    Ryoko being raised under Suna's head Anbu shinobi, she has a mentailty of no fail, although I'll admit I've underplayed her heavily here and will have to rectify it.

    Hi as an Aburame is more stratigy based then Jiraiya comes in. All of these characters are leaders but there's different types of leaders for different types of missions.
    So Koichi is a genius in disguise, awesome. I'm a Jiraiya fanboy which is why I wanted Jiraiya. I would like to see how this turns out. I must say you put a lot of detail in your FF, even creating actual exams that can test and strengthen aspects of a shinobi and creating characters with diverse strengths and weakness. I just decide on a game plan for a chapter when I start writing it and stop writing when I feel it would become too long . Wish I had more attention to detail.
     
         

  11. #11
    Meiton Release Master... MangekyouJ's Avatar
    Status
    MangekyouJ is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Your sisters room...
    Posts
    1,085
    Post Thanks / Like
    Waiting for greatest to be at
    it's peak
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    *Applauds*....where's the subscribe button....Rep+...let me know when you finish the next part....
     
         

  12. #12
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzumaki16 View Post
    So Koichi is a genius in disguise, awesome. I'm a Jiraiya fanboy which is why I wanted Jiraiya. I would like to see how this turns out. I must say you put a lot of detail in your FF, even creating actual exams that can test and strengthen aspects of a shinobi and creating characters with diverse strengths and weakness. I just decide on a game plan for a chapter when I start writing it and stop writing when I feel it would become too long . Wish I had more attention to detail.
    That's what the chuunin exams are. I was having trouble actually deciding on the exams and I'm still sorting out how I want this exam to play out since I know who I want to proceed and who I don't want to proceed onto this last round. However I'm pretty sure I have the focus.


    Quote Originally Posted by MangekyouJ View Post
    *Applauds*....where's the subscribe button....Rep+...let me know when you finish the next part....
    Thank you ^^ I will let you know and if you want to read any of my other chapters (if you havn't already) the link will be at the bottom of the first post in a moment.
     
         

  13. #13
    ℙş⑂ḉℏ☮ Confucius's Avatar
    Status
    Confucius is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    13,927
    Post Thanks / Like
    Real knowledge is to know the
    extent of one's ignorance ~
    Confucius
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Very amusing and interesting dialogue with a strong character build-up/creation/development was shown in this Chapter. I also like how you created this part of the Chuunin Exams. Also, the knowledge (Genius) and skill shown by each character and you, the writer himself, gives a unique added sense of just how crazy this Chapter was. Overall, Awesome Chapter. Hoping for the next Chapter.
     
         

  14. #14
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Kichiro Fujimoto View Post
    Very amusing and interesting dialogue with a strong character build-up/creation/development was shown in this Chapter. I also like how you created this part of the Chuunin Exams. Also, the knowledge (Genius) and skill shown by each character and you, the writer himself, gives a unique added sense of just how crazy this Chapter was. Overall, Awesome Chapter. Hoping for the next Chapter.
    You'll see more character development soon and you'll get your plot entanglement with Kabuto and his slimy affairs for some while to come ^^

    It was hard for me to decide this exams play out and how I was going to display all the character's abilities I wanted to. I use some characters that have clan abilities or familure heritage so you have the general sense and then we won't see much of them for a while but the more important characters I intend to use will make their appearance again will show of their skill sets.
     
         

  15. #15
    Proud Narutard tom94's Avatar
    Status
    tom94 is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    281
    Post Thanks / Like
    This user has no status.
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Really good chapter I am very impressed, I was thinking of working on a side story that sort of intertwines with my main one (From a perspective of a team participating in the current exams) your's has made me want to do that because I thinks it is great you invented new Genin's and given them such an in-depth background! But you called it capture the flag, I was hoping for more fighting and even Naruto getting involved, so evil the way you lead me on :P

    Anyway great chapter and brilliant dialogue as always!
     
         

  16. #16
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by tom94 View Post
    Really good chapter I am very impressed, I was thinking of working on a side story that sort of intertwines with my main one (From a perspective of a team participating in the current exams) your's has made me want to do that because I thinks it is great you invented new Genin's and given them such an in-depth background! But you called it capture the flag, I was hoping for more fighting and even Naruto getting involved, so evil the way you lead me on :P

    Anyway great chapter and brilliant dialogue as always!
    The chuunin exams were difficult for me to construct. Even with this exam which is so close to the Forest of Death, the aspects I added in to make this a unique contest was a little difficult, mainly in the teams and individual shinobi I wanted to have pass onto the exam and how I wanted the fights to play out.

    As for the Naruto thing, he's involved, he's the proctor for this exam
     
         

  17. #17
    Proud Narutard tom94's Avatar
    Status
    tom94 is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    281
    Post Thanks / Like
    This user has no status.
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    The chuunin exams were difficult for me to construct. Even with this exam which is so close to the Forest of Death, the aspects I added in to make this a unique contest was a little difficult, mainly in the teams and individual shinobi I wanted to have pass onto the exam and how I wanted the fights to play out.

    As for the Naruto thing, he's involved, he's the proctor for this exam
    I can tell you worked hard on the chapter it is really good :D I can wait to see the other Suna team out (I know it wont be for a while, as they are a big part in the story) but I dislike them! Proves how well written it is that I hate a team or individual character in a fanfic!

    Does this also mean that I will see more Naruto in this fanfic? Kind of a self confessed Naruto fanboy
     
         

  18. #18
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by tom94 View Post
    I can tell you worked hard on the chapter it is really good :D I can wait to see the other Suna team out (I know it wont be for a while, as they are a big part in the story) but I dislike them! Proves how well written it is that I hate a team or individual character in a fanfic!

    Does this also mean that I will see more Naruto in this fanfic? Kind of a self confessed Naruto fanboy
    Why do you hate my precious Suna shinobi
     
         

  19. #19
    Member naruto kyuubi's Avatar
    Status
    naruto kyuubi is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    in hell
    Posts
    868
    Post Thanks / Like
    This user has no status.
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    the idea was a briliant one. not to mention the chapter as well although i hope you havent planned any invasion for the chunin finals
     
         

  20. #20
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by naruto kyuubi View Post
    the idea was a briliant one. not to mention the chapter as well although i hope you havent planned any invasion for the chunin finals
    I can't disclose that info yet, I think I said too much already hope you understand

    You'll see what happens later on my friend ^^
     
         

  21. #21
    Proud Narutard tom94's Avatar
    Status
    tom94 is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    281
    Post Thanks / Like
    This user has no status.
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    Why do you hate my precious Suna shinobi
    They were mean to Koichi
     
         

  22. #22
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by tom94 View Post
    They were mean to Koichi
    OHHHH you're talking about Team Maiyuri, Masaomi, Koga, and Shizuko not all of them in general.

    Well I've already mentioned this in previous chapters (idk if you've read them or not) but those three are adoptive siblings by their sensei Maiyuri. If you don't know what happened to Maiyuri you should go back but you can assume what happened if it involves Maiyuri and their hating Koichi.
     
         

  23. #23
    Proud Narutard tom94's Avatar
    Status
    tom94 is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    281
    Post Thanks / Like
    This user has no status.
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    OHHHH you're talking about Team Maiyuri, Masaomi, Koga, and Shizuko not all of them in general.

    Well I've already mentioned this in previous chapters (idk if you've read them or not) but those three are adoptive siblings by their sensei Maiyuri. If you don't know what happened to Maiyuri you should go back but you can assume what happened if it involves Maiyuri and their hating Koichi.
    Yeah I did don't worry :P I still don't like them! Koichi is my favourite! He reminds me of Naruto and you know I am a Naruto fanboy
     
         

  24. #24
    Reborn's Avatar
    Status
    Reborn is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
    Posts
    11,256
    Post Thanks / Like
    Belongs to my Shishou
     



    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    Quote Originally Posted by tom94 View Post
    Yeah I did don't worry :P I still don't like them! Koichi is my favourite! He reminds me of Naruto and you know I am a Naruto fanboy
    well I always give reasons for the way characters act, at least we have the other team (Temari, Jo, and Pakura) as a neutral party towards the Koichi.
     
         

  25. #25
    Academy Student badboyhenry's Avatar
    Status
    badboyhenry is offline
    Gender
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    29
    Post Thanks / Like
    This user has no status.
     

    Re: Naruto: Shichiyo Gaiden XXXVIII

    first of all great chapter as usual reborn, i love the way you portrayed naruto, as an over baring but loving father most ppl can relate to that. but there is one thing i don't understand why does jairiya and hime different last names?
     
         

Page 1 of 2 12 Last»

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •