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    Writing time~ Netsui's Avatar
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    Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    It's finally here. It took forever, but it's finally here. And school is almost out (1 and 1/2 days left!) So once summer is here prepare to see a lot more chapters!

    Chapters:
    Chapter 1: Chapter 1
    Chapter 2: Chapter 2
    Chapter 3: Chapter 3
    Chapter 4: Chapter 4


    Fate or Hope

    Chapter 5

    The pain in her head wouldn't go away. It felt like she got hit in the head with a brick. It wasn't unbearable, but it was close to unbearable. She remembered something hit her, but she couldn't remember what she got hit with. She used water to stop the lava, and the masked man was trying to warn her about something.

    “Hey! Wake up! You're alright. You have to be alright!” she heard someone say.

    Someone was calling her. A guy's voice by the sound of it. She was tired, she didn't want to get up.

    “Can you hear me? If you can hear me then wake up!” the same voice exclaimed.

    Whoever it was didn't understand she was tired. She had an exhausting day. A day she hoped was all a dream. 'Should I wake up? Am I able to wake up? Will everything get better?' she asked herself. Every time she tried to run away it ended in disaster. When she tried to face it she was left with pain and confusion.

    She opened her eyes, and then started to cough. The coughing only made the pain in her head get worse. She felt something wet on her face, and noticed her shirt was wet as well.

    “I finally got you to wake up. You wouldn't wake up, so I had to use water,” the masked man said.

    Of course it was him who was calling her. Anyone else probably would have freaked out if they saw her on the ground. She tried to push herself up, but her head pounded in pain. That day was an awful day for her. She couldn't even get up. 'How will I explain this at the hospital? I was already there, and left in a wheelchair. How do I explain getting hit in the head? While I was in a wheelchair?' “You didn't have to use water! I had an exhausting day! If you didn't try to destroy that building-” she stopped. “If I got knocked out protecting the building, what happened to the building?”

    The only answer she got was silence. “Did you hear me? I asked what happened to the building!” Her head protested while she yelled him.

    “You really are an idiot,” was all he said. “Don't you know what happens when lava collides with water?”

    “Lava is like fire. It's hot, and it burns. If it touches lava only one thing could happen. The lava would cause the water to evaporate,” she explained softly.

    “Water could evaporate, but it turns into a rock called obsidian when it collides with lava,” the masked man said. “Your shield became a weapon, and you had no control over it because it was obsidian, not water.”

    It took some time for everything he said to sink in. The water she used to protect the building destroyed it instead. That meant her Mom was dead. “N-No. That wasn't suppose to happen!”

    “Why are you upset? The building is destroyed, but everyone lived!” he exclaimed angrily. “It's annoying when something unexpected happens, but it still works.”

    “If I get in the way then why didn't you kill me?” she asked. It made no sense. This was the second chance he had to kill her, maybe third chance, but he never attacked her. 'What is he planning?'

    “I have my reasons,” he said. “Don't worry, though. I have special plans for you. I'm just waiting for the perfect time. Everything will change.” He then snapped his fingers, and he was gone. Well, he wasn't gone, but she was. She was no longer outside, but was in her room somehow.

    'My bed. I'm finally in my bed,' she thought happily. Her bed felt so nice after the day she went through. It was getting harder to keep her eyes opened. She knew she would give in sooner or later, but there was no need to fight it. She needed sleep. Her vision slowly started to fade, until everything went black.

    She heard the ringing from her alarm clock. 'Morning already?' she asked herself. It felt like only five minutes had passed. 'Wait. What time did I get home yesterday? Did I sleep all day, or was it dark when I got home!?”

    She turned her alarm off, and looked at the ceiling. She had to go to school, but her injuries made it difficult. Her Mom didn't know she was injured. 'How do I explain it to her?' She couldn't tell her Mom the guys who killed Kenji tried to kill her. She couldn't even tell her about the masked man.

    “Mavi, it's morning! Hurry up, or you'll be late!” her Mom called.

    She got up and stretched, and she was about to get out of bed until she realized something. She left her wheelchair in front of the hospital! She was teleported to her house, so she didn't need it. She couldn't fly to school either. “Mom, I don't feel well today! Can I stay home today?” She wasn't sick, but she had to try something.

    “Really? I'll be there in a minute to take your temperature,” she said.

    This wasn't her plan! Her Mom wasn't supposed to check on her. If she didn't have a fever her Mom would send her to school!

    Her Mom walked into the room, but she had nothing in her hands. She couldn't check her temperature with her hand. “Mavi, you said you don't feel well?”
    “Yeah. I think I have a fever. Its been going around lately,” she lied.

    “Oh, really? I didn't know that,” her Mom said. “Is it related to the wheelchair I found next to your door?”

    'Wheelchair? I was teleported here! How did the wheelchair get there!?' She had to come up with a good reason why there was a wheelchair.

    “I'm waiting. I also found a cream for burns next to it. Mavi, what happened?” she asked harshly. “Don't think about lying. I see your burned arms.”

    She couldn't tell her. She wanted to tell her, but she didn't want her to worry. When her Mom found out about Kenji's death all she did was worry. Her Mom tried to talk to her, but she refused to talk. She knew her Mom would worry if she didn't tell her, but it was the best choice. Knowing everything only brought pain, and her Mom didn't deserve that pain. 'I don't know everything, but what I know is painful. I don't want to know everything. What I don't know might be more painful.'

    “You won't tell me, will you?” she asked. “I know a lot happened in the past, but you can talk to me whenever you want. I'm here for you if you ever feel like talking.”

    She would never understand why she couldn't tell her. Someone involved with the government would never believe in weird powers.

    “You're still going to school,” she said quickly. “You're not sick, so I have to send you to school. I'll drive you to school, so let me know when you're ready.”

    Her Mom never asked the same question twice, so she wouldn't ask about what happened again. That was how it worked. That was a reason why she distanced herself from her Mom. Her Mom never pressured anything out of her. It seemed like she didn't worry about her at all. If her Mom didn't care about her, then she should stop worrying about her. She thought that their relationship could change, that was why she saved her. 'Dad. Did you really have to leave? You cared about me. Why? Why did you leave?'

    She looked down at her outfit. There was no way that she would be able to wear it again. It would leave a stain after everything that happened. Her whole entire dress was covered with grass stains. It also appeared to be ripped a little bit at the top.

    She hopped over to her closet, which was more difficult than she thought. She wasn't used to using her left leg for hopping, so she fell twice before she made it to her closet. She opened the closet, and observed the clothes inside. She had no idea what to wear. She wanted to be prepared if she was going to be attacked. The only problem was she only had dresses. She wanted jeans and shirts, but her Mom wouldn't allow her to buy them. Her Mom said, “You're a girl, and girls wear dresses!” Unfortunately, her Mom never learned that girls wore jeans and shirts too.

    She grabbed a black dress, and a long purple ribbon. She had to work with what she had, so she had to try a new style. She placed the dress on the bed along with the ribbon. She pulled her dirty dress above her head, and then threw it in a basket. She grabbed the black dress and quickly put it on. She had to hurry, otherwise her Mom would check on her again.

    She grabbed the purple ribbon and tied it around her dress like a belt. She sat on the bed, and grabbed the mini chest hidden under the mattress. 'Kenji, did my Dad leave because my Mom didn't care? If only you were still alive. I wouldn't be lonely if you were here.'

    Kenji was the one who gave her the chest. He told her to only place the valuables she thought she would lose in it. She couldn't bring herself to open it for the past seven years. Every time she tried she couldn't even look at it, so she never bothered to open it. She figured with all that was happening she should open it.

    She grabbed the key, which was actually hidden on the bottom of the chest. That was one thing she loved about it. They key was in an obvious place, but no one would look there.

    She placed the key in the slot, and then turned it. She opened up the chest, and then placed the key back in its spot.

    She looked in the chest to see the only two items she put in there. The first item was a pocket knife she took from her Mom. She only took it because she feared people would attack her. She was that terrified after Kenji's death. After a few years she placed it in the chest, so that her Mom wouldn't find it and take it away. After what she been through she would need the pocket knife. She took the knife out and clipped it onto the ribbon, so that the pocket knife would be hidden.

    The remaining item in the chest was a small, purple orb. It was her prized possession, which was why it was in the chest. Kenji gave the orb along with the chest. He told her the orb reminded him of her beauty, and that it was a perfect gift for her.

    The orb brought her to tears, but it didn't feel like a daymare. There were no visions of the past, and it seemed like the tears were natural. She somehow managed to force the tears to stop, and then placed the orb by the pocket knife. The ribbon was tied tightly, so the orb should stay in place. She felt like a part of Kenji was in the orb, so she wanted to carry it around. She felt like she needed the orb to survive, since the masked man was still out there. 'Kenji. Just wait for a little longer. I'll change the world for you. I won't run away from our promise anymore.'

    “Are you ready to leave?” her Mom called.

    “Yeah. Can you bring the wheelchair in here?” she answered as she closed the chest, and then put it back by her bed.

    Her Mom came in with the wheelchair, and then walked out. She probably had to start the car so they could leave right away.

    She got in the wheelchair and wheeled herself outside. The sun felt nice after being inside for a while. There wasn't a cloud in sight, so it probably wouldn't rain.

    She waited for her Mom to get out of the car. They had to get the wheelchair in the car so she could use it during school.

    Her Mom opened up the front door for her, and she used the car for support so she could easily hop in. She watched her Mom fold up the wheelchair, and then put it in the backseat.

    Her Mom would back in the car, and drove toward the school.

    “Mavi, did you hear that I'll be home more often for now?” her Mom asked.

    She looked at her Mom. She never talked about her job, but of course she knew what happened. “Yeah. I heard the building got destroyed.” She couldn't say anything else on the matter. If she talked about it she probably would slip; she could have mentioned lava rain.

    “Yeah. I'll still be working, but I'll be working at the house. We can see each other more often now,” she said in a happy tone.

    There was silence as a response. Her Mom was attempting to be a parent, but she didn't have to attempt. She cared about her Mom, that was why she saved her. But if her Mom didn't care then she didn't have to acknowledge her attempts.

    The car came to a stop, and she realized they were at the school already. She opened up her door, and she slid to the side. Being in a wheelchair was so pathetic! She couldn't do that many things in a wheelchair. She hoped the masked man wouldn't attack during school. She wouldn't be able to explain anything if he showed up.

    “Do you need a ride home?” her Mom asked as she pushed the wheelchair in front of her.

    “No. I only needed a ride so I wouldn't be late. I can wheel myself home,” she answered as she got in the wheelchair. She instantly wheeled away from her Mom, and headed toward the school entrance.

    Everyone was staring at her, and they were whispering. She didn't show any reaction to them, even though she perfectly heard some of the whispers.

    “Hey, isn't that the crying girl?”

    “Yeah. Why is she in a wheelchair? What happened to her?”

    “I bet she started to cry again and fell! She randomly cries for no reason, so that had to be what happened!”

    Everyone blamed everything that happened to her on her crying. Everyday she heard someone mention her crying, but she didn't say anything. She stayed on mute, as if she never heard a word they said.

    She looked around the school grounds, and then stopped when she saw someone she just met. He was across from a guy from her class, and it seemed like they were talking. 'What is he planning?'

    Author's Note:
    I'm really not a fan of this chapter myself. I feel like I rushed it a bit, but I don't think it's absolutely awful. And I love cliffhangers, even if they are obvious.
     
         
    Last edited by Netsui; 06-02-2012 at 03:25 PM.

  2. #2
    Senior Member serenaandrosie's Avatar
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    AWSOME as usual Netsui chan keep up the good work i can not wait for the next chapter plus rep
     
         

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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    I'm not first this time Curse you Seren-chan
     
         

  4. #4
    Writing time~ Netsui's Avatar
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    Quote Originally Posted by serenaandrosie View Post
    AWSOME as usual Netsui chan keep up the good work i can not wait for the next chapter plus rep
    Thanks. I'm glad you liked it, since I think it's my worse chapter so far.

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    I'm not first this time Curse you Seren-chan
    I'm going to get 6 up today, so you can be first for that one. ^^ I'm working super hard to get it done! I'm even typing it before writing it just to make sure I get it up quicker! :overjoy: Oh yeah Reborn, one of the mistakes I made in an earlier chapter, I found the perfect way to cover it up! :D
     
         
    Last edited by Netsui; 06-01-2012 at 09:47 PM.

  5. #5
    Senior Member serenaandrosie's Avatar
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    Quote Originally Posted by Reborn View Post
    I'm not first this time Curse you Seren-chan
    sorry Reborn


    Quote Originally Posted by Netsui View Post
    Thanks. I'm glad you liked it, since I think it's my worse chapter so far.

    I'm going to get 6 up today, so you can be first for that one. ^^ I'm working super hard to get it done! I'm even typing it before writing it just to make sure I get it up quicker! :overjoy:
    i am looking forward to your next chapter :overjoy: wease:
     
         

  6. #6
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    The chapter was as awesome always, and I always admire the brilliance of your story-telling, once again. I love it. And you should be proud of it. :3


    Note: At the very ending, I believe you meant "What is he planning?".
     
         

  7. #7
    Writing time~ Netsui's Avatar
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    Quote Originally Posted by -Yama- View Post
    The chapter was as awesome always, and I always admire the brilliance of your story-telling, once again. I love it. And you should be proud of it. :3


    Note: At the very ending, I believe you meant "What is he planning?".
    Thanks for pointing that out! I hate typos like that, because the spell check doesn't catch it.
     
         

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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    Okay, I'll start with the same advice I gave someone else (who asked me if I'd teach them). It's the best thing anyone could tell you short of going line for line and making suggestions on individual sections:

    Well, as you probably already know, it's mostly about the infamous practice. Sure there's a lot of pointers I could give and several excercises that will challenge you, increasing your skills a lot faster, but if I said that experience wasn't the key then I'd be doing you a disservice.

    I started writing when I was 8, now I'm 24. If I had just forced myself to write constantly, I would indeed be a master by now. Sadly, there's many to whom I cannot hold a candle. That being said, I'm no pushover either. My greatest weakness: description.

    Okay, here's a great tip, one that I still use daily to combat my Achilles heel: try to only use a word once, and don't use it again for a while. If you can write an entire chapter, for example, and never use a single word more than once, then that would make anyone a true master. Not that this is really possible, especially when it comes to words like "the" or "and", but it is possible with words like "inaniloquent".

    What this does is increases your vocabulary, thus allowing you to have more ways to describe things. It also makes you more aware of sentence structure, particularly how to build a sentence in such a way that omits a word you're trying to avoid using.

    One more thing, never forsake the grammar/spell checker. Also, familiarize yourself with the thesaurus; I personally use those that are online. Also, whenever you're writing, whether it's just a message to someone or even as silly as a note to yourself, use it as practice. Use words you wouldn't normally, check your spelling and grammar, go so far as to look up a synonym for something (like just now I think I broke google asking for a synonym...for synonym...lol)

    Since it takes a lot of practice, use every opportunity to you can. I used this message; though many would consider it annoying long, I couldn't care less, it was just one more thing to keep me on my toes.
    This^ is just for starters, however, its really hard to do. To put it in Naruto terms, it's like when he was first learning the Rasengan, the first two steps seemed easy enough, but the last one was nearly impossible.

    Like I said, my greatest weakness is description; that's also because it's the hardest thing to do, and the first step is to increase one's vocabulary.
     
         

  9. #9
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    Done. Great chap ^_^
     
         

  10. #10
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    Re: Fate or Hope Chapter 5

    “Don't you know what happens when lava collides with water?”
    I was thinking the same thing when I was reading the previous chapter

    Great chapter! :D
     
         

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