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  1. #1
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Some advice

    So last summer, I had a retail job. I was at the cashier when a familiar customer with his 4 year old son comes in. When ever he comes, he always likes to tell jokes and what not, so I thought I'd bang the first joke out this time. Big mistake.

    When he came to the counter, he only brought one item, so I got the idea to joke and say "Just one item? You aren't stealing are you?" The man was Hispanic and thought that I was being prejudice in accusing him of stealing in front of his son, he did not realize I was trying to joke with him. I felt really bad making him feel like a criminal and have since then stopped joking with customers or people I don't know well in general.

    When I reflect on what happened, I can't help but feel that the situation made me antisocial; I start to feel awkward in conversations with people and fear shedding some humor because I don't want that situation to reoccur. I went from being voted most sarcastic and funny in my yearbook to dry-humor guy just because I don't want to hurt people's feelings if they get offended.

    My question to NB: Should I continue to obsess over what I say with others or should I careless about whether or not they get offended unintentionally?
     
         

  2. #2
    Scathach YowYan's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    It was one mistake ;p Just be alert the next time ^^

    But I can relate to you getting anti-social over a bad memory.
     
         

  3. #3
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by YowYan View Post
    It was one mistake ;p Just be alert the next time ^^

    But I can relate to you getting anti-social over a bad memory.
    Thanks. I'm not the type to be hateful or rude so you could imagine how much this has flip-flopped my life.

    Yeah? What happened?
     
         

  4. #4
    Scathach YowYan's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Unbiased King View Post
    Thanks. I'm not the type to be hateful or rude so you could imagine how much this has flip-flopped my life.

    Yeah? What happened?
    well...failing at some things causing me to shutdown on the whole thing. ;p
    Like for example: My kickboks match, went ok, but not that spectacular. In front of 700 men or so. Just didn't want anything to do with kickboxing afterwards ;p
     
         

  5. #5
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by YowYan View Post
    well...failing at some things causing me to shutdown on the whole thing. ;p
    Like for example: My kickboks match, went ok, but not that spectacular. In front of 700 men or so. Just didn't want anything to do with kickboxing afterwards ;p
    I'm pretty sure you were good at it, hell I'm even sure you're better than me, but you can't let one match decide everything; everyone has a rainy day. Even prodigies eat the dirt sometimes.
     
         

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    Re: Some advice

    Don't worry about what you say to guests. The thing is, whether you said something offensive or you're the nicest person in the world, you will always have the 1 angry guest trying to get you in trouble. You might as well just enjoy it in your own way. There's a lot of things I've said back when I was an employee behind the cash wrap that people you think would have took offense to what I said but actually thought it was funny such as a woman who spilt some water in front of me and I said "damn lady, you don't have to get wet when you see me."

    Point is, world is changing and you don't need to worry about it so much. Also, if you want to progress further, corporate jobs are big on how out spoken you are now a days. They want people who can project their voices, who can make the crowd love them, even if they say something offensive. I would know since that's how I still act and it hasn't stopped me. I still work in the same retail areas, but as a Director today. If I had to thank any of my qualities for making it so far, I'd have to say it's my courage to say those things that others would be to scared to mutter! :P
     
         

  7. #7
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Jonesy161 View Post
    Don't worry about what you say to guests. The thing is, whether you said something offensive or you're the nicest person in the world, you will always have the 1 angry guest trying to get you in trouble. You might as well just enjoy it in your own way. There's a lot of things I've said back when I was an employee behind the cash wrap that people you think would have took offense to what I said but actually thought it was funny such as a woman who spilt some water in front of me and I said "damn lady, you don't have to get wet when you see me."
    'd. How did that situation turn out?
    Quote Originally Posted by Jonesy161 View Post
    Point is, world is changing and you don't need to worry about it so much. Also, if you want to progress further, corporate jobs are big on how out spoken you are now a days. They want people who can project their voices, who can make the crowd love them, even if they say something offensive. I would know since that's how I still act and it hasn't stopped me. I still work in the same retail areas, but as a Director today. If I had to thank any of my qualities for making it so far, I'd have to say it's my courage to say those things that others would be to scared to mutter! :P
    Thank you for your input. You're right, being outspoken is almost a necessity today in all spheres of life.
     
         

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    Member Jonesy161's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Unbiased King View Post
    'd. How did that situation turn out?
    She laughed hard and my manager at the time had her lower jaw hanging in disbelief for what I said. Then after lady left, my manager asked how I wasn't slapped by that lady at all.
     
         

  9. #9
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    Re: Some advice

    This kinda thing happens to me every day, but I'm usually doing it intentionally...so you should probably continue to obsess
     
         

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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Wang View Post
    This kinda thing happens to me every day, but I'm usually doing it intentionally...so you should probably continue to obsess
    But I feel it's holding me back socially to the point where I'm afraid of making a joke.
     
         

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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Unbiased King View Post
    But I feel it's holding me back socially to the point where I'm afraid of making a joke.
    Take baby steps, joke w/ small animals & work your way up
     
         

  12. #12
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Wang View Post
    Take baby steps, joke w/ small animals & work your way up
    Yeah I'll see what the roaches in my kitchen think about my jokes. :L
     
         

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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Unbiased King View Post
    So last summer, I had a retail job. I was at the cashier when a familiar customer with his 4 year old son comes in. When ever he comes, he always likes to tell jokes and what not, so I thought I'd bang the first joke out this time. Big mistake.

    When he came to the counter, he only brought one item, so I got the idea to joke and say "Just one item? You aren't stealing are you?" The man was Hispanic and thought that I was being prejudice in accusing him of stealing in front of his son, he did not realize I was trying to joke with him. I felt really bad making him feel like a criminal and have since then stopped joking with customers or people I don't know well in general.

    When I reflect on what happened, I can't help but feel that the situation made me antisocial; I start to feel awkward in conversations with people and fear shedding some humor because I don't want that situation to reoccur. I went from being voted most sarcastic and funny in my yearbook to dry-humor guy just because I don't want to hurt people's feelings if they get offended.

    My question to NB: Should I continue to obsess over what I say with others or should I careless about whether or not they get offended unintentionally?
    He is mentally retarded
     
         

  14. #14
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by November Nolove View Post
    He is mentally retarded
    I guess he has his own insecurities for whatever reason.
     
         

  15. #15
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by November Nolove View Post
    He is mentally retarded
    lol!
     
         

  16. #16
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    Re: Some advice

    Accidents happen.
    They simply misinterpreted what you said, you didn't purposely try to offend them.
     
         

  17. #17
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Celebi View Post
    Accidents happen.
    They simply misinterpreted what you said, you didn't purposely try to offend them.
    Thanks, this is what I've realized lately.
     
         

  18. #18
    >.> meh. This name sucks.. Voltron's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    shit son....
    ummmm... I've pissed off lots of people in my life. the best thing to do is to admit to yourself that you have made a mistake and move on
     
         

  19. #19
    Goldmember Unbiased King's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by DisturbedInside View Post
    shit son....
    ummmm... I've pissed off lots of people in my life. the best thing to do is to admit to yourself that you have made a mistake and move on
    Thanks. I guess people will always get offended somehow or another.
     
         

  20. #20
    >.> meh. This name sucks.. Voltron's Avatar
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    Re: Some advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Unbiased King View Post
    Thanks. I guess people will always get offended somehow or another.
    no problem. You always have to accept that. I have.
     
         

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